Motivation Monday: The GoGo Life.

Disclaimer, I am about 8 years old than most of these girls on this video, and while I probably will never be able to chase my dreams of being a “professional” gogo, I am okay with hitting up a few more festivals before I hit 35 and maybe put that part of my life in my history, but who knows? There are women in their 70’s who do bodybuilding competitions, why the hell couldn’t I do freaking dancing in my 30’s right? This video, in particular, was inspiring:

Love MsEasy, and her frankness and honesty, and I wish she could coach me!  Now, as I have mentioned already, even if I were in Denver, I probably have missed the boat on becoming a professional performer (maybe not with hooping, but I would need to improve drastically), but even so, it would just be so amazing to get to do an event like Electric Daisy Carnival, but I do not have much in the way of videos from performances and I would need to get an audition video out. The only problem is that, as my body is right now, I feel uncomfortable dancing around scantily clad, as one would expect from a dancer, and thus the clean eating and preparation for that. If I could just lose 20 pounds, that would go along way to making myself feel more confident with performing. I don’t want to give up on a dream, so I want to be even more focused and determined to get to where I need to be with this weight. That is why I need to SWEAT EVERY DAY (see what I did there) and just make sure all my eating habits are super balanced, gosh it is difficult but it really isn’t if you have a goal that is bigger than yourself.

Another great way to get toned is through hoopdancing, another one of my passions. Just doing some youtube surfing, I found these great tips on how to improve, and thought I would share:

I hope having the phsysique that is desired for gogo dancing will be enough to keep me  motivated. It might be a judgemental, there is just no room for flabbiness within that art. Dancing really is brutal, and I really need to evaluate my ability to be visually appealing for this particular type of performance. Any go go tips would be greatly appreciated, too. Stay sweaty!

Squatober, bitches!

Mixed it up a little and decided to poach fish instead of chicken last night, and danced danced danced to some trance music including Antiloop and Mubali (name dropping time: the latter is actually a friend of mine from my psy-trance raving days, good times.  So, I am not sure what is going on with me, but I cannot go to bed before 11 and thus cannot get up before 7 to actually make it into my class, and it really bothers me. Something stupid keeps happening like waking up at 4:30 in the morning, so I will end up going back to sleep but be too exhausted to actually make it awake, and I don’t want to sacrifice something as essential as sleep, so no go on the hot yoga this morning, yet again. Man, I am getting sick of typing that, well there is a simple solution for that.

Small successes though, as mentioned, I did get about 45 minutes of dancing done last night, and I have completed two of the eight rounds of 25 per day for my 6000 squats in 30 day challenge. I have to say it is almost not enough of a challenge, even making full squats with just body weight. I hope it is enough to actually get some physical change in my posterior. Fitspo is great inspiration, but admittedly I was skeptical that the ones that have perfectly round asses with a pithy caption such as “squats” really meant that the chick in question did squats, but rather it was a genetic blessing that gave her such a bountiful booty, so I am going to conduct my own experiment and see if doing 6000 squats in one month will give me the results I need, and it really isn’t just squats either. Hopefully, there will be some insanity, some dancing, some hooping, and some weight lifting incorporated. Those are my goals anyway. I probably won’t hit the 110 mark by November, but maybe by 11/11, sucks that I couldn’t hit 111 by 11/11/11 but I didn’t even have access to an oven at that time!

I am not even concerned that doing so many different things at the same time will confound the results of my experiment. I get too bored with one thing, I may not be consistent with one thing, but as long as I am somewhat consistent with a bunch of different things, it will show similar results if I stay active. Plus, muscle confusion, brah! hah, anyway, have not been doing the Whole 30 as anticipated, for one, the cheaper broth for the poached fish had sugar as one of its ingredients. For two, I kinda like the hot cocoa keurig cups in the office plus I do actually like creamer in my coffee and I gave it up for a month, didn’t see that much harm in my digestive system when I added it back to my diet.  Yeah, sure I gained 7 pounds in September (but most of that was due to the sodium from this past weekends Chinese delivery) okay, I can’t blame that on going off paleo, I can, however blame that on just completely falling off the wagon diet-wise, mmmm  Torchy’s Tacos but even labeling certain foods as verboten is a bit silly, unless you are diagnosed with gluten intolerance. If you do have a legitimate condition such as Celiac, just from reading about this disease, even a bit of gluten will make you have digestive woes. However, my gut is just fine and really I think that the 80/20 might be applicable when it comes to clean eating. I have heard that one before but it always felt like either I wanted to starve myself or binge, maybe I do have a bit of an eating disorder.

Alas, I must get back to my day job, as much as I would like to pontificate about fitness and healthy eating, it is time for me to depart. Stay sweaty, mothertruckers.

I’m losing focus

It is hard to write this because I feel like there are a lot of things that I want to do but some weird imaginary force keeps me back from them. In reality, there is no force, it is just me. I keep repeating to myself that things are going to be better in October, but are they really? There is an end of the month anxiety that I feel, maybe it is partly watching my bank account drain from the plethora of bills I am paying, or maybe it is just a disappointment of not having completed my goals from the month before and slowly watching my life dissolve in front of me. Fuck wrinkles, by the way.

Reorganizing my goals into categories helps but it really isn’t enough. I still have the desire to buy a new pink purse, or some other thing that I don’t really need in my life. It seems like it should be as simple as creating a flowchart with a basic question, “Does this action support or detract from reaching your goals?”..  With the obvious “support” -> do the action or “detract” -> don’t do the action, dummy! It should be that simple, shouldn’t it? I just wish that the desire to do to bad things wasn’t there.

Fucking autosave, I had all this stuff written down and now it is gone. Anyway, poached chicken = awesome and doesn’t cost me $400. Not technically, but yes, I ate sushi Friday, and since this is not yelp, not going to name names of this terrible place, but they had charged us $397.48, and let me tell you, it was good sushi but it wasn’t that good, and it was just a generally bad experience, and normally I would overlook something like this and just focus on the food, but Strike 1) the server made a snide comment about how quickly we ate. Strike 2, they made this terrible error, and then Strike 3, when we went into the place so they could cancel the transaction, they basically told us to GTFO in awkward English, sorry but it is true. I hate it when you cannot communicate dissatisfaction with someone because of that, you would think they would at least know that this was at terrible mistake and correct it, but there were a ton of people and it was a lot of pressure for us to leave. So, yes, those three things will definitely not make me come back there.

Because I have bitching a lot lately, I wanted to take a break and just express in reality, that though my student loan, credit card, and automobile loans might be almost unbearably high, last year at this time, I was living in a 300 square feet extended stay because of my bad credit and ended lease. Now, I am in a 1100 sqft place and have room to explore my passions such as dance, hooping and blasting tunes. I think there was more that I wanted to say, but I can’t remember it.

Doin Thangs

Actually, not really. Not enough sleep in the past 3 days, insomnia and this morning I had to get up at like 6am to take my boyfriend to the airport. Yeehaw, but the rest of this month I have vowed to myself to at the very least to get my finances in at least somewhat order. It is pretty bleak, however,  when I actually pay all my bills. Such is life, I am not really in a good place to move, so finding employment elsewhere would be a challenge that I don’t know I can handle right now. The best I can hope for is that  revenue will pick up in our company and that will translate to a higher salary for me, but at worst if it doesn’t and I don’t get a raise, in April, it will mark my 5 years with this company, so that would give me a lot of leverage if I chose to take my talent elsewhere and perhaps to a more managerial position. Anyway, having everything clearly indicated is truly a stress reliever, even it means that I have to hide my debit card from myself and live on an “allowance” of cash for the next 2 weeks.

Just trying to remain positive, even if things are difficult right now.  This weekend will be lonely, but not necessarily in a bad way. Having a long-term relationship sometimes means that you become attached at the hip so to speak with your significant other. Plus the apartment is a mess,  and I kinda like jamming out the tunes and practicing some dance moves while I do my hausfrau duties. Speaking of which, I need to finalize my to-do list for the morning, so that in the afternoon I can relax and enjoy the day. Tomorrow morning, I get my platinum hair done, hey budget or not, I will NOT go around with 3 inch roots! I may or may not go to the park for some psy-trance (depending how nasty the weather is), and tomorrow evening I have a dinner party to go to, so that will be fun. Now, I know what you are thinking, what about the whole 30? Welll.. Sunday I have a six hour, yuck, defensive driving course I need to take and there will be pizza. I know myself well enough that if there is a yummy food around something that I am not wanting to be at such as a 6 hour course, I am going to indulge. That’s just the way it is. So, the best I will be able to do is on the 17th, hell I may not even do another one, great way to set up a success. Pardon me, I am pretty amped up on Zero Cal Monster, so the tangential rambling may be a bit intense today.

Not to mention, the breaks I am forced to take because of work, fucking day job, why can’t I just be a badass bloggerina to support myself (and I talk about not having enough money now). So yeah, check out the two new pages I have added:  31 things while 31 and Lauren’s Library books are added as I read or am reading them, so that should help with Goal #1, if you are paying attention! Well, super busy, wish I could muse further on my complete failings at life, but there is too much shit to do, so until I have more more time, TTFN!

Loving this rain:

Here are some songs about rain:

 

On the road to the second Whole30

Lack of inspiration, not so much that I have nothing to say, just more that I feel like a hypocrite. Oh sure, I will start out with healthy intentions and eat stuff like this, very delightful dish of “breaded” chicken (almond meal and coconut flour) with sauteed broccoli and sweet potatoes:

However, those intentions will quickly dissolve and I will be eating stuff like this:

This was the Philly Cheese Steak served with garlic and parmasean tater tots. The tots themselves were nothing to write home about but the fact that they added garlic and cheese to them really made it a nice touch. I wouldn’t say it was the best cheesesteak I have had in Austin, my personal favorite is Texadelphia, but whatever, cheesteak is like pizza. You really cannot screw up the unholy trinity of fats, carbs and meat.  So obviously, my reintroduction phase hasn’t exactly been gradual, more like ramming whatever tastey goodness I can find down my gullet. Jeeze Louise, I am getting hungry just thinking about the feasting last night. Amazingly, I have stayed under 120 pounds, despite my efforts to sabotage myself, oh please I act like I did not bike on the stationery 15 miles yesterday morning. Bla bla bla, you can’t out-exercise a shit diet, but considering I only have one or two really crappy meals, I’m doing okay.

Just okay. I am trying internally to fixate my intentions into actions. Not comfortable with discussing them, because I think that is a sabotage. Oh and there is this, but in terms of blogging, does that count as saying them. There is also the saying, “Ink it, don’t think it” that I have heard in terms of goal setting and achievement. I do see a lot of people that I am following declare their intentions, but for me it seems a bit like saying them, so I get scared. Ugh, deja vu, like woah. Yes, it feels like I have talked about this before, so maybe I will shut up and try to focus more on what I can add to this thing that will make people actually want to read it. Seriously, my stats have been horrible lately! I know this endeavor is mainly just for me, because writing is fun and it is something I don’t get paid for, but if this were a job, not sure if I would still have it based on the website traffic. Let’s be honest, how many people actually keep a private blog, I would assume very little. The whole point of this is to create and captivate an audience, right? Or is this just my own narcissism and histrionics? Perhaps, my content isn’t that interesting to anyone but me, and that is sorta okay, too, but I would like to think if I am putting effort into something, that other people would want to pay attention.

It is hard to say for sure how to become successful at something without trying to piggyback from celebrity or resort to sex appeal. Oh, it is certainly tempting, but I am not sure my cellulite dimpled ass is something anyone wants to see. Speaking of cellulite. It really sucks, and it terrible looking. I have read more articles than I care to admit about the subject, but tried very little mainly because of the wikipiedia article that states that this phenomenon is something that has never really been “cured”. What say you audience? Have you ever been able to improve your cellulite? What was the most successful treatment?  Isn’t cellulite the worst?

In terms of setting goals, have you been more successful blogging about them or just “shutting up” and letting your progress speak for itself?

Day Nineteen

The motivation is very weak today. Very much a lazy Sunday I am having. Tried to do a new circuit workout on the iPad called “Remix Workouts”. I am not sure if it was the mechanized voice or the repetition, but it was boring and I stopped halfway through it, and decided it would be more fun to post, so here we are.  First things, I was able to complete two milestones yesterday. One, I  my 50 mile “lifetime” badge from FitBit, and two I got my first Focus Wristband from Sunstone yesterday for attending 10 classes.

I don’t think I would have been able to do it with my gorgeous (okay, except for the dark ends of the avocado) paleo brunch. Yes, while I may have skipped on the Hollandaise sauce and mimosas, I managed to prepare myself a great little meal yesterday morning, which I plan to do again today.

Day Three

It is a beautiful morning in Austin TX, you know before it approaches triple digits during the middle of the day! 14 more pounds until my GW, as suspected just needed to do some penance from my Sunday brunch to get the weight back down to desired. No drinks or dining this weekend (nevermind the fact that I would be too broke anyway!) “CHAOS” class from CGArena was terrible wonderful. Strangely enough way more sore in the hamstrings then the upper body, but really achey all over, that’s good, right?

It sucks that they are so expensive, though, the LivingSocial deal allowed me to have 20 classes for only $29, but it would normally be around $65, so that is obviously a bit out of my budget. At any rate, I will be able to take 19 more classes this month and enjoy the benefits and then continue with my at-home fitness. Following my motto, “sweat every day”, looking forward to some strength training plus boxing at 6:00 pm. Yay, the fitbit finally shipped, hopefully Monday it will finally be here.

Sleep, what can I say about it that is interesting? Weird dreams and waking up thorughout the night. Getting 7ish hours is pretty good, wish I could have made it to the 6am cycle class, but I felt like nailed to my bed this morning, gotta love those DOMS. As I have gotten older the idea of waking up at 5:00 actually does appeal to me. The night owl thing is okay when you are in college, but really what is there to do after midnight besides watch Netflix or drink (or both)? However, being an early riser is challenging, especially in the summer. There is daylight until 9 pm, and so you get to enjoy about one hour of nightfall before you have to sleep at 10, and with that schedule you only get 7 hours, so it is tough, but this may be all that I need.

So, I need to get back to work, and I guess tomorrow after hot yoga/cycling, I will discuss stress reduction!